Tuesday, 15 November 2011

Squirminess Arrested

It's Tuesday evening, C2 is, as usual, in Perth, J and I are back from swimming lessons and a late dinner.  He's watching Phineas and Ferb while I have a glass of wine and try to muster some energy for the bedtime routine.

I am assuming that the reason for my crushing fatigue of late is owing to my new job!  If you recall, in several posts from the last year, I referenced my desire to re-engage my pre-baby, pre-trailing spouse, pre-round the world adventuring brain.

I was on the cusp of professional re-engagement in Geneva last year when we decided to move down under.  We've been here 11 months now and I continue to seek balance in my life.  Life has tilted badly out of balance during the last several months.  C2's professional life keeps him in Western Australia too much, he is exhausted too much, I am single-parenting too much, and J and I are adapting to his absences too much.

In the midst of all of this, the ideal job entered my world.  During many of my laments about being squirmy but stymied about how to co-mingle professional fulfillment with our complicated family life and travel commitments; many comments centered around engaging in meaningful volunteer work.  A commitment that would get my head back into the game, make a difference, but at the same time be flexible.  My background is in the not-for-profit sphere and that is where know I can make a meaningful difference.

Enter the wonderful NGO Child Wise.  An Australian organization that is all about making a difference.  Dedicated to the prevention and reduction of child sexual abuse and exploitation in Australia and Asia Pacific.  They focus on programs to identify and eliminate opportunities for child sexual abuse and child sex trafficking.  If there is a more noble cause, I haven't seen it.  Child Wise survives with a skeleton staff dedicated to the cause.  Part of the team work day to day to keep the organization afloat largely through private philanthropy and charitable donations.  That's where I come in.  I am working in Development 2-3 days a week, researching potential revenue streams and writing grant proposals.  I am engaged, I hope I will make a difference, I am fulfilled, and in spite of my current exhaustion, I have found some balance.

In addition to my own fulfillment, I think that it is critical to J's evolution into a well-adjusted young man, that he see me as more than a one-dimensional person.  More than the mum whom he takes for granted to pick him up from school, feed him, and do all his bidding.  He needs to understand that women are equal in any family dynamic.   I am happy that he has a Dad who is a gourmet cook, I am happy that all three of us sit around on Friday nights and watch 'Better Homes and Gardens', I am happy that he knows when the new edition of the magazine is released.  I am tickled that he loves to watch 'Junior Masterchef', has a desire to cook, and planted tomatoes this year.  I am delighted that all three of us ski, mountain-bike, hike, and engage in similar adventure sports.  I am thrilled that all three of us are curious, open-minded, and increasingly see ourselves as citizens of the world and less of one particular nation.  I sincerely hope all of his experience will mold him into an enlightened man with no pre-conceived gender notions.    A man who respects women and ultimately enters into a partnership of equals.


Elizabeth said...

How wonderful for you and rewarding! These are wise words, and I wish you much success as you move forward --

Jen said...

I am so pleased. Balance is hard to find but oh so precious. Seeking time for thyself, as my Quaker grandmother used to say, is so needed.

And J. has two amazing parents to watch and learn from and there is no doubt in my mind that he will turn out amazing in his own way as well.

Now, if we could just find some balance for C2.....

Melissa Miller said...

Oh my goodness, what a great thing to get involved in! J's been lucky to have had a parent so singly focussed for so long. What a gift! And now he will learn that his mother is willing to work for other kids who deserve good, safe start, too.
Proud, impressed, and wishing you every happiness,

Debs H said...

Congratulations on the new role! Does the tiredness ever leave though?! :)

Sheila Cook said...

a) I have NEVER thought of you as one dimensional!!
b) I love your writing - with wisdom and intelligence
c) I am very proud of you that you have taken on this position and run with it!
d) I'm writing this from Montreal
e) I miss you.
f) xxxx

Audrey said...

Congratulations on finding the ideal job. With your talent for writing and tackling projects will be simulated in this new activity.
Do you see a little similiarity in this job and ORS -your first job many years ago!!
Good Luck

DL NELSON said...

As a single working professional parent, I know there are never enough hours in the day and you then one adds in the guilt you are not doing enough...my daughter hated when Harry Chapman sang Cat's in the Cradle, because I started sweating guilt. However we survived and rather well. J will too as will you. I've no secrets to share...you do the best you can at the moment each moment